Where your loved poured out

I have had a lot of time in the car in the last week...driving what seems a million hours to florida can do that to you. On the way home tonight this song began to play...

Lead me to the cross, where your loved poured out
Bring me to my knees, lord i lay me down
Rid me of myself, I belong to you
Lead me to your heart

If you do not know this song look it up on youtube.

This chorus caught me probably for a number of reasons. "Bring me to my knees," caught my attention because the last few months I have been continually brought to my knees..knowing that I cannot take another breath or step or even make it to class without His help.

The biggest thing that caught me was "Rid me of myself, I belong to you." It reminds me of Matthew 5 where Jesus says, "Blessed are the poor in sprit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Blessed are the poor in spirit...what is that? I dont believe that jesus is saying that the people we see on the street who are poor, meaning have no place to live, no food are poor in spirit. What I mean is..that is not what he is defining the poor in spirit as...

Poor in spirit are those who recognize how evil the heart is. How morally bankrupt they are, how they dont have it all together...who are tired of themselves so much that they are on their knees begging for Jesus to take it away and fill them with himself. They are saying rid me of myself..my selfish desires, my wants, my everything. I think the poor in spirit are those who recognize their "moral bankruptcy" and are ready to do something about it.

I think I am finally beginning to understand more of what being poor in spirit is. This time as been horribly painful, but now that I have begun to process the last 4 months I am beginning to see what the Lord is slowly showing me. He is showing me that I am bankrupt..that I cannot do anything on my own. My wants and desires are selfish..I have begun to live my life for me and not for him. So he is leading me to the cross...where his love was poured out. He came to earth to live a life that we could not to die a death that I deserve. I know that I am not worthy enough on my own for his Kingdom, but through the power of his grace and sacrifice I am seen as perfect... Imagine that...Perfect.

The beginning of the song begins, Savior I come, quiet my soul...QUIET my soul Lord. He is in the process of quieting and healing, but first he has to break so that he can rebuild it (me) to be who he wants me to be...It is such a hard process...If any of you are there..I cant tell you how much I understand the pain. but remember this..God is our father and our king forever...He knows our every step and is with us every step of the way.